I've learned so much of the reality of this chapter of the Bible...love. Yesterday my mom and I had to cross the border into Nicaragua because I don't have a student visa and have to leave the country every 90 days. A parent of the school drove us there, and a friend picked us up on the other side. It's not an understatement to say the border is a bit chaotic. It took us about four hours of lines, stamps, confusion..but amongst it all there was love. There was love in the people who drove us who stayed and waited to make sure we made it across, in a crippled young man who's eyes as he begged said something different-offering peace and not expecting sympathy, searching for an unknown destination it seemed. There was love in the police officers who joked with us when both my mom and I didn't get our passports stamped, and in some local Nicaraguans on the other side who shouted comments of congratulations when we finally came across the border.
Honestly, I was really nervous, straining my brain to communicate clearly and translate for my mom, but when I got past myself and my own fears, I opened up to the love that was all around me. In the bible it says that perfect love casts out all fear, and most often it just takes that push out our comfort zones to see it. Someone once said, "You can't steer a car if you're not moving,"; if we let fear consume us then we are nowhere, trying to steer while still in the same place. But when we allow the perfect love to cast out fear, we begin moving in a direction that God will guide and take the wheel. ."
My mom came down to visit me (and take me out of the country), and before we left she had a chance to spend a couple days in Monteverde. Being with her, it felt like I was back at the beginning, seeing everything for the first time. Buying food at the Ferria on Saturday, the big Frisbee game, square dancing, getting free rides when a familiar taxi driver drives by in the pouring rain, waking up in the middle of the night by howler monkies. All the things that have become part of my everyday life, I saw through her eyes and felt really really blessed.
I have two worlds now it seems and having my mom here I realized I am a part of a new language and community here, as well as a part of something on Orcas and both worlds will never fully know each other. Still, I could have the best of both, but if I have not love, I am nothing..Thank you so much for your prayers...lots of love and blessings :)
Emma
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