Friday, September 24, 2010

Where Did September Go?

Hello Orcas Island and family! :)

I can't believe how fast this month has gone!

It's been a hard month-academically, socially, spiritually... Many aspects of who I am have been tested and tried, and I know there is such growth in that. At the same time, it has also been a great month that is concluding the introduction to and the forming of my first impressions of United World College-USA.

On some Friday nights, we have "Global Issues", and tonight we talked about sustainability-what it means to be sustainable, how developing countries can grow in a sustainable way, ect. Someone mentioned that the failing economy was a direct result of not living in a sustainable way, and rather than viewing it as a hopeless circumstance, we can look at it as an opportunity to change the patterns of life before to a less impacting and healthier standard of living. It is a lot of fun to discuss issues that are prevalent in society with students from all over the world, because our perspectives and backgrounds are so diverse. There is always something to learn from the people sitting on either side of me.

Outside of classes, we do something called "CAS" which is a requirement for the International Baccalaureate curriculum. CAS means "Creative, Action, Service" and we spend a significant amount of time doing such activities each semester. Two weeks ago, I went to work at a homeless shelter that my school helps to run in a nearby town. The experience was almost surreal, serving food in a small musty house, and discussing things like jobs, education, and family with people that may not have known any of them. I got to talking with one man who's real skin was barely visible through layers of tattoos, and he told me about the years he spent in jail, and about an older woman who dedicated the last years of her life to helping him learn how to help himself. As he talked about her and the visits she made daily to the jail I couldn't help but wonder why someone would do that. When I left that night, everyone said "Come back soon, sister!" and reflecting on the interactions between the homeless people at the shelter, I remembered that they address each other with "brother" and "sister" in order to better identify themselves and feel a part of something. The woman visiting the man Alfred who I spoke with, in jail loved him so unconditionally and for no reason that she changed him-the genuine emotion she must have shared with him taught him to love, and the benefits from such an action continue to spread.

I have kept busy with a different activity every day of the week-Fridays I grab my helmet, harness, and shoes and go rockclimbing on a face near campus. Tomorrow I will begin to give tours of the historic Castle we now use for classes and dorms to the outside public. My favorite CAS however, is math tutoring at a local elementary school. This last week, I went with three other students representing Afghanistan, Japan, and Finland to tutor. It's great to see how enthusiastic the young kids get about hearing about new cultures-one of our favorite activities to do with them is count in each of our different languages.

I will do my best to write more soon :)


This is a photo of a team of friends on a weekend backpacking expedition to summit the highest peak in New Mexico. Almost all of us got some sort of altitude sickness at the top, but it was more than worth it for the view!

If you'd like to see more pictures of life at UWC-USA, here are a couple of links to my school website where they are posted from current events:

Welcoming Ceremony- https://www.uwc-usa.org/podium/default.aspx?t=52562&a=134142

A Video of Orientation at Ghost Ranch-
just from the photos you can get an idea of the diversity in the student body! https://www.uwc-usa.org/podium/tools/SlideShow.aspx?a=134989

Love,

E

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

UWC-USA

The first couple of weeks here at the Armand Hammer United World College have been a bit chaotic. I look back to the first few days here-staying up until 3AM to wait for the last bus to arrive at the castle from the airport carrying onboard other students from around the world, meeting my roommate from Sweden, going to church with three friends and representing four continents, fasting for Ramadan to support my Muslim friends, discussing atheism with a Pakistani, an Israli, and a friend from the UK. It's taken me a couple of moments of standing still and breathing deep while everything happens around me to center myself and prepare for the journey I embark on now; a journey unlike anything I have ever done and probably will ever do. I just got back from a backpacking expedition with ten people including myself, representing ten countries. When isolated in the mountains of New Mexico there is a lot you can learn. Like different sleep patterns other cultures have for example-I woke up much too early one morning to Andrew, from Uganda, blowing a whistle telling me that the day "HAS BEGAN!"
Many of my "co-years" do not speak English well yet, but we do our best to communicate. School started today, and it started slowly. We are taking the time to get to know the different ways everyone has been taught and how to learn in the diverse fashion we do. It's amazing to sit in a classroom with students from around the world-but even more amazing to know most of the learning is not going on in the classroom.
We had a "Welcoming Ceremony" last night, where everyone dresses up in their national costume and we have a fancy dinner in the Castle. My co-first-years and I sat at tables in the Castle dining room (that looks somewhat familiar to the dining room in the Harry Potter movies :)) waiting for the second-years to join us. My eyes wandered from the stained glass windows to the other wandering eyes of a Canadian and a Belarussian, until I saw a flag wave in the doorway.

"Afghanistan".

..Someone read into the microphone. Afghanistan's ambassador walked down middle of the dinning room as people cheered him on. Seventy or so countries later down the alphabet, Stuart, representing the U.S. and Japan walked down the middle of the room, which now had waving flags encircling us at our tables, carrying a flag that read "United World College". I thought about my diverse friends that had carried their flags and saw it beautiful that though they are from a culture so different from my own, they are still unique in their personalities. They are soccer players, and comedians, musicians and mathematicians..and they are here teaching me about their culture, and learning from my culture in order to for us to create a more peaceful world of understanding. After dinner, we were led outside to where there were candles lit around the flags on the lawn outside the Castle. The second-year students were holding hands and me and my class held hands behind them, creating a circle that could sing "We are the world.." and have it be true. After a few words from the school president and students, I was more or less "inducted" to the United World College community. We then joined the circles that made up the first and second year class. I held the hand of a friend from Lebanon and Sweden, and looked at the Africans joined with the Germans, and the Mexicans with the Australians. I thought of church my first Sunday here with my friends from three other continents and listening to what I thought was a confused pastor speaking about how Islam is wrong, Hinduism is wrong, Buddisim is wrong. He seemed to believe that what he thinks is right and no other beliefs are. And I think that is where we go wrong. Looking around a circle with dominating peaceful hearts, I could see it doesn't matter what we put down on paper, what we read, and I'd go so far to say even what we do. It's who we choose to be, and really BE when we are alone and in our own thoughts. It's the love we find inside ourselves that is the love of God, forever forgiving and willing. If we choose to open our hearts, we will find God there. We will find Him everywhere. Even in the atheists. I let go of the hands in that circle and realized I am a part of something much bigger than me-something that is bigger than that entire circle though still prevalent in it and that is the love of God.


This is the a guys dorm in front of the Castle, at the Welcoming Ceremony.


The Japanese ambassadors with their flag.

I can't write much longer, but I hope to write more soon!

With love,

Emma

Sunday, July 25, 2010

The Poetry of Life

If I were to collect photographs and videos of my growing up, I’m sure I could build a better explanation for why I define myself the way I do. I could retrace memories with my fingers along worn picture frames. Maybe the lack of explanation for my being, the unnamed emotions that brought me to where I am alone is what defines me. I’m curious about the fall I chose not to play soccer, the time I missed my flight home from Costa Rica, and the people that came into my life as if on a jaunt who changed my perspectives. What could’ve been?
I opened a fading magazine from it’s spot in the sunlight in a rustic store in Mexico. It gleamed with many offers, but the best was it’s offer for me waste away the time until we could finish shopping, check out, say our last “buenas noches”. In the middle of my mindless time-killing, a glossy ad caught my eye. It showed the sunset across rough waters and a sandy beach-the orange in the sky flowing as if it was painted by a child’s watercolors-and taunted me: “This could be the best day of your life”. As I looked more closely at the ad I found that it could be the best day of my life IF I enjoyed a cruise on the clear water. Still, the ad spoke to me. The time I had spent inside the magazine’s faded cover seconds ago, I had happily viewed as “killed”, now fit the real, sad definition of the word; lost and gone. Time so quickly goes from present to gone, with the potential it continually offers me to have a great day, maybe the “best day”. Can we narrow all definitions of life down to one word, the common ground and familiar scarcity of time? It is all we really have.
I met a man when I was surfing recently and enjoyed arguing perspectives, sharing the differences in our lifestyles, and learning, despite all of our differences. While debating whether the East Coast or West Coast of the states was “better” (he was arguing the West Coast was, so I of course took my position on the contrary) he told me he noted people on the East Coast ask “What do you do for a living?” where people on the West Coast ask “What do you do to live? I wondered what an Oaklahomian would ask, while taking these questions into consideration. Both questions do imply one thing-life. That we are alive, living, and impacting the world we live in. How I live makes a difference. A difference to me of course, but regarding numbers, I am unimportant compared to all the other lives that benefit or perish from my choices, which is ultimately the answer to the question of how I live. Choice.
The wonder of choice scares me. Holds me back and weighs down on me while I let the wonder dominate my curiousity. Every day, I am expected to make a choice to wake up, get dressed, go to school, eat dinner, ect. And every day, there is the opportunity for more. There is always so much more. I learned about “more” when I learned spontaneity but it doesn’t happen that way for everyone. An indigenous Costa Rican man Miguel discovered “more” when he discovered money. He defined the word “more” the way many people do in Western culture. My friend Eric was born in a small town in Wales and “more” was plane tickets, bus rides, and more plane rides away in cultures new to him. “More” is like life and defined thousands of ways. Still, “more” is a decision. One I try to make daily to move forward and make choices that prevail to define the word for me.
Often when I make a choice, I expect and long for closure while I transition. When I asked Maddy what “life” is, she said “the game”. Pink and blue people moving in coloured cars at the spin of a wheel where you stop, but only to let another person go. Life is poetry, music, water-flowing without pause because it is more beautiful that way. The closure I longed for all year from home never happened because I decided definitely to go to Costa Rica five days before my plane took off and now it seems too late to say goodbye to home when I feel unsure where to even call “home” anymore. I know God did this for a reason to teach me about how open life is. When it feels like every door has slammed shut behind me after I walk through it, I can know it is only emotion coercing me into a form of nostalgia and second guessing because God says nothing is out of reach. Choice is opportunity and never closure. Someone noted to me once that when you ask a child if he/she can draw they will most likely reply with an enthusiastic “YES!” whereas a few years later as an adult they are more likely to reply “No.” Why? Is it us, scared we won’t be good enough, or is it society declaring we aren’t? My stick people may not resemble a real person’s dynamic face, but I think if God were peering over at my artwork, He would call it beautiful because it is my own perspective. If you ask 100 people to paint the same sunset, no one will look the same. The way every person defines our world is different because no perspective is the same. No one else can even see the exact same color blue as I do when they look at the water, we all see it the slightest bit differently. I see God sitting in heaven painting our varied beliefs, personalities, and view of the world to contrast like all the colors in that sunset to create peace in the beauty He sees.
God knows us so personally. He knows our every choice, and every way we differ from each other. We are His own masterpieces and I love to picture Him smiling down on us daily as we interact. The more I look for it I see God is romanticizing about us, and writing our stories down in His language. We are more than just names or words because we have a purpose and it’s so abstract. We are His poetry.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Steps and Mountains...

I thought I would send a quick note to let those of you who have prayed for or supported me that I received news yesterday that I have been accepted to be an ambassador for the United States as a Davis Merit Scholar at Armand Hammer United World College.
This means I will spend the next two years there studying the International Baccalaureate curriculum with 200 students from 97 different countries. I will be learning about things from Theory of Knowledge to global issues in an environment that thrives off of its diversity.
I’m so excited about that God is beginning to open doors and show me what he has in store for. I was running the other morning and stopped to look out at the huge mountains that surrounded me, and the way the sun was beginning to rise out on Nicoya. I listened to the song “The Words I Would Say” by Sidewalk Prophets and was overwhelmed by emotions when I heard the words
“Be strong in the lord and never give up hope. Your going to do great things, I already know. Gods got his hand on you so don’t live life in fear. Forgive and forget but don’t forget why you’re here. Take your time to pray, these are the words I would say.”
These are the words I had always heard from God, from my family, and from the community that holds me on Orcas…those are the words that held a strong foundation under me when I was shaking. When I looked out at those big mountains, I was in awe that God made them with His hands. They suddenly didn’t seem so impossible to believe or too big too conquer, because I have that Man that made them in me... I could feel the wonder of God in his vast creativity when he made the earth, and the sun came over the mountains, hitting the gulf miles away. I doubt I will ever experience perfection, but I seem the closest when I am being honest. When there is only genuine honesty, it seems to be when we can best learn about the perfection we find in God. That sunrise was the most beautiful image I’ve ever seen, and I’ll keep it in my mind forever. I heard the words “don’t forget why you’re here” and knew God had me has for a reason, a new one every day. I don’t doubt the reason it was the most beautiful I’ve ever seen is because I saw it alone. There was such contentment in solitude at that moment, without feeling alone, that I knew God was there. I know He’s been with me all along.
God has so many plans for us and it really does just take stepping out to where we are uncomfortable and lost that we find Him. The only thing stopping me from my dreams was I. Being out of my comfort zone for a long period of time has been the most powerful experience I’ve ever had. When I went back to the states for my interview with United World College I just cried for like my first few days home. My guard was completely down and there was no one I had to be brave for anymore, including and especially myself. Still, there was nothing better than coming back and putting on my confident shoes because once I wear them enough I don’t even realize I have them on anymore and that confidence becomes a little more part of who I am. Every time I see those mountains, I’m just as in awe, but a little less afraid because I have a great, humbling God in me that is bigger than them. I watch the mountains continue to get smaller and smaller as I grow.

I'm posting the lyrics to a song I wrote called Step, that tells a bit about how I've felt lately about trusting God.

Step

Verse:
I learned a lot by observation
What to, and not to do
I counted stars at night
Wondering how they shine through
All this to be surpassed
With brilliance of things I never knew
I took a walk down a narrow road called my life
I took a look around to see what I could find
There I found
A Man with an offering
And seemingly He'd been standing there
All along

Chorus:
A tell-tale of life
Starts with one
Step
Without promise it won't be hard
There's no catch that says
You won't fall down sometimes
Step
There's always a hand to balance
To hold while we dance
As we step in time to this life

Verse:
There're people who believe in love and those who have opinions
There're faces elderly with lots of worldly wisdom
Where to guide us for each New Year's resolution?
Aren't we defined by our observations?
Where to begin if we say every day is a new day?
Each step, another chance
formed by what is, a backwards glace

Chorus

Bridge:
Each step was deeply pondered
Before your birth
Still each one directly impacts this earth
There are steps you'll learn were wrong
But they're the ones that wrote this song

Chorus


Thank you for your prayers and support.

Love always,

E

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Quick Updates

It's been a long time since I last wrote, so I thought I would give you some updates.

I arrived back in Costa Rica about two weeks ago after my time in the states. I went straight to the Caribbean Coast to do my Junior Project with an indigenous tribe of people called BriBri. I learned so much while I was there and it's hard to fit into the short amount of time I have to write. I feel to blessed to have gotten to see a culture that lives on less than $1 a day, how the United Nations says 80% of the world lives. The indigenous people didn't recognize that they were in poverty until Western culture began to influence them, because by their standards, they weren't in poverty. I wrote an essay about poverty once, and while writing it, I realized I have no place to define it. The people who are IN it are the only ones who can say what it is like, and they are often the least heard. I spent time in BriBri with a 16 and 13 year old the majority of the time, showing me around. They both were attending public school and were curious as to why they learned things like algebra and European history when it's so irrelevant to their lives. They are two of very few indigenous children that attend school. The education the indigenous children need is about the medicinal plants around them, the stories of elders, and how to weave palm leaves to construct a house. Western culture is not survival to them, because money hasn't met anything until now. The indigenous culture of BriBri is beginning to collide with Western culture and the indigenous people are losing their traditions. I loved spending a week their learning about cultural differences and I hope to go back again to continue to ask the many questions my project raised.

The SUN is going away...the three months of summer in Monteverde ended and now it is "winter" again...today there was a loud tropical rainstorm in the afternoon and I think this will be a constant for my last few months here.

Costa Rica has come up with new traffic laws and have been reinforcing them. With exceptions...I climbed in the back of a truck with a few other people, and everyone in the front was on each others laps. The "trafico" watched us pack in like sardines and as we drove away from him, the driver of my car waved and the trafico smiled back with a huge thumbs up. The government is also considering changing the laws about drunk driving, because some of the best soccer players have been thrown in jail and couldn't play in the games, and even the government officials are big fans of Costa Rica's soccer team and don't want to be blamed for any losses.

I was thinking about BEAUTY the other day, where I find beauty, and what beauty is. I thought about beauty in nature and in words, and then in love. Love is like beauty in the way that it looks and feels different to everyone

I thought I would just send a quick HELLO to everyone, and a few updates on what I've been up to.



Thank you to all of those who donated to the Monteverde Friends School for the Walk-A-Thon, it was a big success and a lot of fun!

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Learning to be me

I remember when I first arrived in Costa Rica, months ago now; I sat on the porch of a small hostel with my dad. He would go with me to the town where I was to live for the next few months that day where we would both see it for the first time. When we sat on the porch I looked out to see tin roofs and clotheslines, trash on the streets, and people crowding sidewalks where if I were to walk, I would not look like the crowd. There were spiral stairs that climbed down from the porch and I remember my dad told me that when I went down them, no matter what happens, I would be changed. Everything that occurs after that will be a memory, profound or not, that will define me one day. He was right. At Christmas, I stayed at the same hostel before catching my flight home, and I saw those stairs but I didn’t go up them…i just observed them from a distance and remembered what my dad had told me. I felt a lot of things had changed in me since then. This week I will be flying home to do an interview I received with United World College, and I look forward to passing by the same stairs to say a quick hello as I say goodbye for a short time to the Emma that lives in Costa Rica. I have spent almost seven months living and traveling within Central America, the large majority of it in Costa Rica, and I have lost all definitions I had of home. I feel accustomed to living in a third world country, and seeing poverty daily. It was sadness in my former eyes but now it’s my life. I speak Spanish, my second language, on a daily basis to convey my needs, and it feels the same as my first. I eat breakfast with my Costa Rican family, help my little brothers get ready for school, and converse about life experiences that are so differente though I never feel there’s not common ground-there always is. I’ve grown to trust public transportation that costs less than $8 to go across the country, and to trust the police, though they aren’t always trustworthy. I’ve met inspiring people in the funniest nooks and crannies of my travels and experiences; not surprising that the most interesting people are experiencing unique things. I’ve concluded a lot about myself, and defined my self in a new way-who I am when I am alone. In these months I’ve immersed myself with new groups of people of all ages and backgrounds, different activities, and found new interests and a deeper faith that I’ve grounded myself in for no one else’s watching eyes or expectations. In these months I’ve learned to be me.
I was walking home from town last week, and I saw signs informing me that there was construction on the road going on ahead. I was surprised that people were attempting to fix Monteverde’s broken dirt roads. When I was in sight of workers covered in dirt in neon vests, I read a sign the same shape and font as the others that said things like “work ahead” that read “Mejoramos su calidad de vida”. Which means like “We better your quality of life”. What the sign read contrasted with what I saw that it announced, but still it was beautiful. Making someone’s life a little better starts the moment you are exposed and dirty and accept it while others pass by.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

La Chunga; Panama

I just recently got back from an indigenous village in Panama, called La Chunga. My classmates and I wrote a few reflections that I thought I would post to summarize a bit about our trip. I was riveted and amazed by the indigenous culture; it was unlike anything I’ve ever seen before and I think you’ll read that my classmates felt the same. I apologize that some things may not be translated fully and a little disorganized :)

Arriving:

Pamela- Es un mundo totalmente diferente al que estoy acostumbrada a vivir. Desde un principio yo sabía que la experiencia iba hacer única e inolvidable pero la verdad es que este viaje sobre paso mis expectativas.
It’s a totally different world than the one I’m use to living in. From the beginning I knew that this experience would be unique and unforgettable but the truth is that this trip went above and beyond what I was expecting.


Curtis- After a dark, nearly day long bus ride, as we pulled into the terminal in Panama City the veil was yanked off the world revealing a cornucopia of color, music, and life.

Curtis- Colors everywhere, horns honking, people yelling, people running…After walking around the only mall I’d been in for the last year, eating a cheese steak and a gyro, and a 3 hour session of Pokémon I was concerned about how I would react in this “low-tech” environment after such a huge blast of western culture.

Emma- When we were in the airplane going to Sambu, I glanced down to see the skyscrapers and skyline of Panama City getting small as it fell behind me, and the open ocean led the way.


Ruby- My mind drifts back to the beating sun on sticky streets, the colorful buses winding their way through traffic in Panama City, the tight space of the tiny airplane we took to Sambu where all the boats looked like little toys in the great sea, the lazy water of the Sambu River as we motored upstream, and finally the feeling of solid earth under my feet as we landed in La Chunga, the light fading on the faces of our welcomers, the Embera people.

Emma- The people stared at us shamelessly while we looked around once we got off the plane; we were the fish a child brings home from the fair that were swimming in a pond that morning and later float around in a fishbowl looking out in curiosity while big eyes stare back.

Emma- Cuando nos acercábamos a La Chunga en la oscuridad, podía escuchar instrumentos que ellos habían hecho y cuando llegamos, yo vi hombres y mujeres en sus ropas tradicionales con sus hijos cerca. Se sintió extraño que ellos me saludaran con mucho amor antes de ver mi cara y antes de que yo haya dicho una palabra, pero me saludaron con el amor de una familia sin juzgar. Era el amor del cual aprendí durante mi estadía allá.
We approached La Chunga just after dark and were greeted by the sound of wind instruments and drums, and as we grew closer, by men and women dressed in their traditional clothing with children at their sides. When we got off the boat the adults and children embraced us and the children were quick to grab our hands, or any limb of the body they could hold on to, to guide us to the village. It felt odd to be greeted with such raw love before they could see my face and before having said a word, but it was the love of a family without judgment. It was the love I would continue to learn about throughout my time there.

Brian- As we walked into the village, two children clung to my sweaty hands making me realize the compassion that existed through lack of western exposure. Even though slightly overwhelmed by this gesture, I accepted knowing even though I was a stranger, I was a guest and therefore a friend. Immediately I was reminded of a similar kindness and genuine loving nature of the Kipsigis tribe in Kenya. Having also visited them, I could notice great similarities through simplicity and knowledge of the surrounding land. Both tribes were clearly preserving something valuable that didn't exist outside their borders.

Jose- Pensé que era muy interesante estar ahí en silencio, comiendo en la oscuridad, agarrado de la mano de un niño de cinco años. Lo divertido fue que se sentía que yo era el niño pequeño, no él.
I thought it was really interesting to be there, in silence, walking in the dark, holding the hand of a little boy. The funny thing was that I felt like I was the little boy, not him.

Emma- Cuando llegamos, tenía mucho sueño después del viaje tan largo, pero yo tomé tiempo para escribir en mi diario y escribí, “No sabia que lugares como este existían en el mundo.”
I was tired after all the traveling, more tired than I have been in a long time, but I still sat down to write in my journal that first night we arrived, writing “I didn’t realize places like here actually existed.”

On Children



Daniel- “Los niños son increíbles para quitar las paredes sociales. Cuando estábamos sucios ellos nos tocaban y abrazaban. No les importaba como se veían, entonces a nosotros no nos importaba tampoco. Como visitantes, nos sentimos mas cómodos con nuestros cuerpos.”
The little children were amazing at breaking down social barriers. When we felt sweaty and dirty and disgusting they climbed into our laps, rode our shoulders, and held our hands. Appearance was not so important for them, so it did not have to be for us either. We, as visitors, became more comfortable with ourselves.



Pamela- Me parece muy importante mencionar la amistad que establecimos con los niños en La Chunga. Fue una sensación muy linda cuando todos y todas ellas nos recibieron con sus caritas pintadas con jagua y muy sonrientes. Y con el pasar de los días cada vez nos uníamos un poco más. Me gustaría saber como nos percibían ellos; quiero decir: si nos veían como amigos, como visitantes, como “gringos”. Ahora que estoy aquí me digo a mi misma que interesante comparar a los niños y niñas en La Chunga y mi sociedad. Mientras aquí los videojuegos se apoderan de la mente de los pequeñitos, en La Chunga aprenden a sobrevivir en la naturaleza; mientras aquí tiene un par de zapatos para ir a la escuela, otro para ir salir, otro para jugar, otro para estar dentro de la casa, e incluso uno para ir misa, en La Chunga solo necesitan algo para cubrir sus piecitos y aun así hay algunos que anda descalzos.
it seems really important to mention the friendships we established with the children of La Chunga. It was a wonderful feeling when all of them recieved us with their smiling faces painted with jagua. As time passed we got closer. I would like to know how they saw us; did they see us as friends, guests, or as “gringos”? Now that I am here (in Costa Rica), I tell myself it is interesting to compare the children in la Chunga to those in my society. While here videogames takeover the minds of the little ones, in La Chunga they learn how to survive in nature. While here they have different shoes to go to school, to go out, to play, to be inside the house, and to go to church, in La Chunga they just need something to cover their little feet and still some of them walk around barefoot.


Ruby- We had mini carreras, bare feet thudding on the patchy ground. All the kids, us included, went to the river to have splash fights and jump from the ledges, and just spend time together in a watery whirl of happiness.
Tuvimos mini carreras, los pies descalzos golpeando el suelo seco, y el césped. Todos los niños y niñas, nosotros incluidos, fuimos al río para tener guerras de agua, y brincar al río desde las orillas, y simplemente disfrutar y pasar tiempo juntos.



Ruby- At ease and feeling lively, I felt so much younger while I was there. I shared the giddy laughter of the children and chased them around the yard until we all collapsed, rolling around on the grass.

Spending time in the community

On harvesting rice: Randy - While picking beans, I found myself thinking how people need to plant food to survive and how we, the civilized people do not plant even cilantro for our food, that is why I am starting to value the work my father does to plant the beans that we eat, and how I admire the people who plant rice because it is the principle food in the Costa Rican diet.


On hauling a wood-carved canoe called a piragua up and down a large hill: Curtis - The piragua haul was the event that convinced me of the ability of a group of people with a strong enough will to do anything. At first when we arrived there were about twelve people there, about half of which were under the age of ten. Initially I was doubtful after seeing the size of the boat and the steepness of the hill we had to pull it up. But as more people began to arrive I began to think that maybe it was possible, but still was doubtful. But once everyone took their place on the rope and pulled it taught as we all prepared to begin to haul I knew we could do it. At first it was only a foot or two each heave, but as everyone found their rhythm we began to pull the piragua farther each time. Five feet, ten feet, one incredible haul even lasted for fifty feet if not more.



Despite being so accepted in the community, we were strange and foreign. I often times felt in the spotlight, automatically noticed as a walked down the path. Going to the swimming hole, it was impossible to go undetected. Starting out by yourself, you would have gathered ten or more inquisitive kids by the end.



On dancing;our culture and the Embera culture:
Ruby- We presented the English country dance, the Salty Dog Rag, Salsa, all dances that are sequenced and require prior knowledge and “dance skills” to be able to perform somewhat successfully. The music that these dances are put to is complicated as well. I lost myself a bit in the steps and the struggle to not mess up, which I ended up doing anyways. Their presentation differed greatly. The beat of the drum and the wind through the flutes floated through the air as the villagers kept steady rhythm with their feet on the pavement. They had simple formations, forms they would take to represent an idea or tell a story. For one dance, they pulled us up so we could all dance with them. It was a basic step of swaying back and forth, one step, two step, feet together, feet apart. It was about feeling the beat inside and letting it vibrate through you, moving you in the dance.


Singing with some indigenous children and my friend Ruby

Change / Loss of Culture

Naomi- I have not had the chance to see how tourism changes culture here in Monteverde, but in La Chunga I was able to experience this. It seemed like this culture that had been virtually untouched for many years all of a sudden was being molded and changed by tourists like us who were trying to learn about their culture. When we were talking about the trip beforehand I was not thinking about our impact on them and I was definitely not trying to change them or affect them negatively in any way while we were there. But, it seems like we do no matter what. Our cash economy and our western idea of life had an effect on them and I will always have mixed feelings about it. I enjoyed sharing other aspects of my culture with them but I regret bringing in the negative influences we have. It was eye opening to be the tourist and watch our effect on the children and the other people in the village.

Pamela- Cuando las mujeres nos estábamos pintando con jagua una niña me dijo que yo era muy bonita pero que si me ponía jagua iba a verme fea. Y en la noche de talentos un joven me dijo que ojala el pudiera cambiarse la piel, le pregunte asombrada que por que, y me respondió que para ser reconocido como un gringo. … Esto me hizo sentir triste y como sentirse avergonzado de quien uno es. Estoy de acuerdo que es muy interesante conocer gente diferente y cosas nuevas pero sin olvidar quien es uno y de donde vino y estar orgulloso de eso. I felt that the elders are the ones appreciating more their Embera culture and maintaining it. Spanish is becoming the first language in the new generations and they don’t know much about their own roots. When the women were painting us with jagua a little girl told me that I was very pretty but if I got painted with jagua I was going to look ugly. And that night at the talent show a teenage boy told me that he wished he could change his skin, I ask him why, “Para ser reconocido como un gringo” he said.


Emma- The moments I enjoyed most usually occurred during our downtime in the afternoon. This was often a time to share and talk with the indigenous people. In this time, playing with and speaking to the children, as well as elders, I noted the way that the kids talked to each other in Spanish while the older generation spoke to each other only in Embera. We could literally see the change happening in the culture of the Embera people. It made me wonder what the future for the children will look like, and how they will define themselves one day.

Katy- Nine year old Veiker understands Emberá, but says he does not want to speak it.

Pamela- No se que tan cierto será, pero sentí que las personas mayores son las que están valorando mas la cultura Emberá y las que mantiene muchas de la tradiciones ya que las nuevas generaciones español se esta convirtiendo en su primera lengua y no conocen mucho sobre sus propias raíces.

Pamela- Por lo que he escuchado, La Chunga ha estado cambiando drásticamente, lo cual le esta trayendo cosas positivas al igual que negativas. Es igual que Monteverde, los últimos anos Monteverde ha cambiando mucho y todavía lo esta haciendo para beneficio de la comunidad pero siempre hay perdidas en ese proceso. El cambio es inevitable, el cambio es parte de la vida. Con el tiempo todo cambia y las personas cambian y nuestro deber es tratar de sobrellevarlo de la mejor manera posible. Monteverde is changing for the benefit of the community but there are also losses in that process. Change is inevitable, change is part of life. Time changes everything and everyone and our job is to handle it the best way possible.


Paula- So what has the world come to, when our own ancestor’s traditions are considered strange and out of the ordinary, and we have been enclosed by a world of Malls, skyscrapers, trash, computers, cell phones, electricity, deathly chemicals, conflict, destruction, cars, noise…? …And all we used to know was the resonant laughter of a young child and the blazing sun on our hardworking shoulders.

Brian- The curiosity to see what lies past their borders, the influence, and objects capable of spawning jealously are all extremely dangerous to a frail community. Their culture hangs by an awfully thin thread.


Time

Daniel - I woke up early the first morning and spoke with the cooks in the house. They explained to me that they did not like when we spoke English because they were left out of the conversation. I explained that Spanish was my second language, though I realize now it probably is for them too. … I was not depending on anyone else to maintain the conversation.

Pamela - I felt, like other people in the class, that time was not important when we were there. It was simple, you woke up with the sun rises and you went to sleep when the sun set.
Yo sentí, al igual que otros compañeros, que la hora no era del nada importante estando ahí. Era simple uno se levanta cuando sale el sol y se acuesta cuando este se ha ido.


Education:

Emma – Un día trabaje con un muchacho llamado Felix enseñandole inglés. El tenía muchos preguntas y era muy curioso. En eso estaba pensando, que yo tengo la oportunidad para aprender y tener una educación buena, pero a veces yo no aprovecho al máximo las oportunidades que se me brindan. Cada persona a la que le enseñamos puso toda su atención y verdaderamente quería aprender, y me enseñaron que si tengo la oportunidad, debo usarla.
I worked one on one teaching English to an indigenous man Felix and he asked lots of "how do you say" questions. I had originally attempted to teach him structure and grammar, but his curiosity quickly became more important. …. It made me think about … how sometimes I have not taken advantage of the opportunities for knowledge that have been offered to me. Most every person we taught English to tried as hard as they could and genuinely cared about learning, teaching me that since I have the opportunity, I should do the same.


Randy - Félix valora su educación y lo hace desear querer superarse no importa que tan lento es, pero superarse. Aquí no nos tenemos que preocuparnos por trabajar o por apoyar a alguien, toda nuestra responsabilidad es estudiar, no importa si es buen estudiante o no, todo lo que importa es el deseo de salir adelante con algo que lo haga feliz.
Felix values his education and it makes him want to improve him self no matter how slow it is, but getting somewhere. He explained to me how his parents supported him, not economically, but morally. Seeing his desire to study and improve, having a family to support made me notice that here we do not need to worry about working or supporting anyone, all of our responsibility is to study, no matter if you are a good student or not, all that matters is the desire to get somewhere else that makes you happy.

Pamela - Aprendí muchas cosas; pero no ese tipo de cosas que se aprenden en el colegio ni en libros, sino más bien cosas que me hicieron ver otra parte del mundo y que me enriquecieron como persona.
I learned many things, but not the kind of things that you learn in school or from books, but things that showed me another part of the word and enriched me as a person.

Physicality / Bodies

Ruby- The traditional garb exposed more of the body than we are used to seeing, the top of a woman and the back side of men. This felt completely regular to me during our stay. Nakedness was defined differently, and people viewed the human body in a different and refreshing way. No longer was it a objectified, sexualized, inappropriate, and no longer was it something to tuck away under layers of clothing and keep secret.

Ruby- It was also very interesting to hear the perceptions that the people had of us, especially about our skin, which was considered so white and delicate. Many times my name was Gringita.


Jose- One of the events that I think some of my classmates didn’t have the chance to experience was to play soccer with some of the teenagers. While I played soccer with them I was interested in what they were talking about, and see how they were, since we had spent time with the adults and children, and not a lot with the people of our age. They only talked in Spanish, not Embera. They mostly talked about the soccer game, like, “pass it!” or “you stink!” typical of any soccer game. The second game was a little bit more intense, it was after we had English lessons, where I had the chance of teaching one of the teenagers that played soccer, so that helped, and I felt more welcomed, and I felt a little bit less conspicuous. But from this game I listened to the most interesting thing that they said about me. First, they thought I was from the States, or didn’t know that I could speak Spanish. So therefore they started telling each other to play soft, since I was playing, and I was delicate. They said that my flesh and bones were delicate and soft, and that they shouldn’t play hard because I could end up getting hurt badly. All I did was smile; I thought it was really interesting.


Ruby- On the hike to the Piragua, the carved boat which we all helped haul out of the forest, a few of us spotted the kids in front running down the path. We decided to join them in their epic dash through the forest, and we ended up running most of the way. Just the feeling of my body and mind coordinating with each other, calculating, working to push me forward down this winding forest path, it was exhilarating, I felt life in my limbs, a life that I had not noticed in a long time. My body became a haven for me to rest in. More than ever, I recognized how important it is to use the body to its greatest potential.

Simplicity / Way of Life

Pamela - Muchos de nosotros a veces pensamos que varias de las cosas que tenemos son necesarias e indispensables para continuar con nuestras vidas normales. Como por ejemplo: automóviles, teléfonos, computadoras, cocinas, refrigeradoras, entre otras maquinas y cosas artificiales. Es cierto que muchas de estas maquinas nos facilitan muchas cosas como la comunicación y el transporte y otras son solo “comodidades.” Pero conocí una parte de este inmenso mundo donde nada de esto se necesita para vivir. Y me gusto mucho. Siento que es mejor vivir con solo lo que se necesita y con lo que la naturaleza provee. De esa forma hay mas conexión entre nosotros los seres humanos y el planeta y toda la flora y fauna que en el existe, también no hay ese pensamiento de que nosotros somos superiores a las demás criaturas.
A lot of us sometimes think that many things we have are necessary and indispensable to continue with our normal lives. For example, automobiles, telephones, computers, kitchens, refrigerators, and some other machines and artificial things. It is true that many of these machines facilitate the communication and transportation and others are just “commodities.” But I discover a part of this immense world where any of this is needed to live. And I liked it a lot. I feel that is better to live just with what you need and with what nature provides you. That way there is more connection between us the human beings and the planet and all the wild life that exists in it. Also, there is not thought of us being superior to the other creatures.

Naomi - Spending time around the village and learning about their lifestyle was rewarding as well because of all the interactions they have. I could walk around with children at my side and at every open house I could see people inside and wave to them.


Daniel - Some of the most special and beautiful things in life require a person to be in one place for an extended period of time. … The Embera live, for the most part, in the same place their whole lives. They know every left and right turn within a four hour hike of their town. They know the medicinal purpose of every plant they see as well as its name. They know every person in the village. The Embera are the experts of their own lives.



Ruby- In all truth, their culture is headed for many changes, what with the new generations losing cultural traditions, not learning the language, and the increasing tourism in the area. The natural world around them is changing too. I wonder what La Chunga will look like in a few years, and then in ten years or twenty. How will these changes affect peoples’ lives there?

Katy- Perhaps ecotourism will help the Emberá preserve their culture and the biodiversity around them.

Questions:



Emma- Everywhere we went, the people of La Chunga stared at us and followed, utterly intrigued by our words and appearance. When I asked Jonathan why this may be, he answered, "I'd do the same too if people from Mars came to visit me."


Brian- When looking at a new idea or someone I’ve never seen or been exposed to, I often have trouble taking them in or processing the new philosophy. Through time, I'm able to see through the differences and adapt to new ways of going about my same old routes. Sometimes, it even so happens that I learn to enjoy an alternate perspective, realizing how twisted things seemed from my former eyes. The Emberá have shown me the beauty of simplicity. How it is possible for a community of people to thrive, while lacking the material items that we have come to call necessities to life?

Daniel- I do not want to live in my hometown, Haddonfield, my whole life. Panama made me think about my role in Monteverde. I am a boy passing through other people’s lives, here only for a temporary visit. Where and when will I make my home?


Randy- Civilization gives us different ideas about what to think, and what we should do and not do.

What a world we live in, full of time limits, of pressure, of worry, of discomfort and so many ideas that do not let us live peacefully with our surroundings.

Ruby-La Chunga is so much a part of me but is also becoming more and more distant as I sink back into the world I knew before.

Friday, February 12, 2010

Toros!

Costa Rica's sport-bull riding. Always fun :)

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Studying The Distance

A few nights ago there was a luna llena, a full moon. I left early that morning with my family before the sun outshone it to go to Guanacaste, a beach town, to visit relatives as well as the beach. We left Monteverde where I live at about 4:00AM and by the time we were winding around the roads down the mountain, the sun began to rise pink and orange and all the colors I imagine draw out my dreams at night. The full moon stayed visible though and as the roads winded, so did my head trying to keep my eyes on the moon over the mountain, which looked more like a big patch of the sky that God erased rather than the moon. I thought about the distance between me and the moon and I thought about what would happen if the car were to drive off the cliff I looked down out my window and concluded that yes, if I had the chance to save someone I would save myself first. I thought also about the distance between home, and me, and that seemed to puncture what I didn’t realize was an open wound-I feel farther away from home than from the moon. It’s not the distance measured in meters, it’s the distance measured in Emmas. I don’t know how to define home, and nonetheless myself and as I discover this I realize that I never had. I’ve heard “Home is where the heart is” and that is true, but that also means I have a lot of homes. The distance in between them is me, and maybe within myself where God is, is where home is. A friend told me that you don’t have to leave yourself behind to grow, and that he doesn’t burn his house down just because it’s messy. When he told me this, that I don’t have to leave myself behind to grow, for some reason it was the most profound knowledge revealed to me. I didn’t totally want to believe it because my main focus since I’ve been here has been to “leave myself behind!” and let God “change me!”. I don’t doubt that he has. But now that I’m looking back I don’t doubt that all parts, traits, flaws of me were included in evaluating and calculating what the change would be. He likes every aspect of who I am, and wants me to grow, but to hold on to who I genuinely am at heart and not to let that change. If He wanted me to completely change, to be somebody else, wouldn’t He have made me that way? On the drive back home after a busy weekend-LOTS of relatives to meet, bull riding matches which turn into hooligians running in front of the bull to provoke it then towards the fence for their lives when the bull charges, and a beach full of local Costa Ricans eyeing me wondering how exactly I fit-my five year old host brother Jean Carlo came up with a new game. He looked around, out the window, asked his brother, whatever he could do to think of words that I then would translate to English. “Gato!” he’d exclaim, “cat.” I’d reply, trying to fill myself with the same excitement. “Oja!” “Leaf!” “Gallo pinto!” “Spotted rooster…” I replied, trying to directly translate the words we use for rice and beans. This went on for what seemed like hours until finally he got bored and occupied himself by counting to thirty nine, (then onto one hundred, making me question my education and developed knowledge that forty comes after thirty nine..). I couldn’t tell if this game was a quiz about the Spanish words I know, or a way for him to learn English, but there was interest, and that was the distance he went. He chased his interest, the way I chased mine here to Costa Rica, and pursued his goal, though I never figured out what it was. There is a distance we will all go for something; for love or for material things, for hope or for a dream. The distance often is not revealed to others, and sometimes not even ourselves, but is present in the way we live. I haven’t calculated the distance of how far I’ve come from the way I was, or how far away I am from who I will be, and the distance changes every day. I’m studying it and letting it guide me and I know that it can’t be measured, thoroughly clarified, or defined but there’s always a distance to something-someone, somewhere-and it guides us and lays between us and the destination even when we aren’t aware it is there.

Friday, January 29, 2010

A few photos


Playing a game of Scrabble with my host brother Jean Carlo


Friends Toto and Mau playing and singing a song they wrote at an open mic in town


Hiking in the rainforest reserve with other foreign students our first week back


The sun setting as I write this..

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Smiles :)

There are a lot of moments in life you can look back on and smile. Then there are things you look forward to smiling into the distance. And then there are moments that occur while you stand grinning. A few days ago I learned what it means to smile, and more how much it really DOES mean. I went running through Monteverde, where I live, and waved eagerly to the cars that honked as they drove by recognizing that I am back. I didn’t know people in half the cars, but I remembered what I had began doing before I left…
As I would run, I smiled or waved at the passing faces I recognized but did not know, and also at the ones I did. In smiling you can give such pure emotions without saying anything. A teacher once told me when he goes out on the one main road there is in Monteverde, he smiles or waves at every car or person he sees. I asked him what happens if the person the gesture is directed at wears a questioning face, as if they are trying to understand directions to somewhere they've never been before, and they don't wave or smile back, and he simply told me, “They will eventually.” He was right, too. Last semester I did it one day just to try, and my mood lightened as I smiled at people during the forty-five minute walk home from my friends house. By the time I got home I felt euphoric and almost giddy. So I kept doing it. I came back and forgot I had done this for so long, but now the people I used to wave and smile at do it to me first. I realized most people I would smile or wave at I now have personal relationships with, in seeing them outside their car or off the streets, or just stopping to talk to them on my way. Sometimes we hardly realize we are capable of it, but real joy can be passed on with a smile in less than a second.
I just finished playing what began as a passing game between a few people and ended a full on soccer match. The sunny days tend to welcome people of different ages, genders, and cultures to the futbol field behind my school. Sharing something with someone, like a common goal, a team, or that as simple as a smile is where the common ground love is begins. I believe we all share something, even if it's a tiny something, and in learning this I have realized there is no reason not to love. Everyone I meet has something to teach me, and by loving them-or simply smiling at them as I pass-I can create an openness that allows them to do so.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Home, Safe and Sound!

Thank you for the prayers and keeping me in your thoughts as I came to my home here in Costa Rica. On my flight into San Jose Aeropuerto, I enjoyed speaking Spanish once again using the Costa Rican slang that I know better than the language of Spanish itself. Though I was sad to be leaving my family in the states, I felt home the moment I looked out my window at the Gulf of Nicoya with it’s turquoise waters surrounded with pristine sand. Little tin roofs and farms lingered beneath me as the plane landed and I was surprised at how safe and relaxed I felt to be coming back. I didn’t realize how much a place this home held in my heart until I began to see it all again. At the airport I got rather unlucky with who was the officer at immigration. Getting into Costa Rica depends a lot on who the officer is. Some hardly look at your passport, and others drill you with questions until they can deny you entry. The officer asked me many questions and I was quick to remember how to speak Spanish, it became a necessity to remember it when he told me I couldn’t enter the country without a return ticket and proof I had enough money to be in the country alone as a minor. Basically, he sent me back and told me to find a plane ticket home at that point. I did my best to argue without getting thrown in a Costa Rican jail until the officer told me no way. Close to tears after dealing with the tough officer, I wished I had my mommy to hold me and tell me I was okay, but I didn’t. I didn’t have a cell phone, internet, no means of communication with anyone. God always shows Himself in the strangest ways because as I dragged my bags out of the hour long line I had just waited in, a man that worked at the airport (or so it appeared from his uniform) asked me “podria ayudar con algo?”. I almost hugged him. I don’t remember too well, but maybe I did. What he said after that was that we could do a “truko” which is like a “trick”. I was hesitant to say yes, but I was desperate at this point so I did. He went and talked to his friend that worked for an airline and had me printed out a fake boarding pass to leave the country. Then he said in case I went back to the same officer, I had to withdraw $100 cash to show him I had enough money to be in the country alone. After lots of walking and trouble, I made it through customs and the same officer gave me a “bienvenidos a Costa Rica”. I could tell he didn’t want to say it, but he did and I went through the toll, turning around first to thank my new friend with a grin. I never believed there is something good in everything bad. But it just takes looking. Or waiting, for God to show you what exactly it is. Costa Rica itself is HOT right now, lots of sunshine, though in many parts it is raining so things are flooding. Monteverde isn’t flooded but it is quite rainy. I feel so blessed after watching the news, about peoples tin roofs and houses collapsing or losing all they have worked for, to have a door to close at night, a sheet to keep me warm, warm rice and beans, and a tin roof of my own to listen to the rain pound on. I know my whole Costa Rican family is really, and we thank God daily for what we have. School has begun once again and I am busy studying between “mejengas”(soccer matches), playing guitar, or running with my friends through the jungle. I had to get some lemons today from the supermercado, but by the time I got there they were closed. I looked in the window and saw the woman that works behind the counter and she gave me a huge smile as she ran over to open the door for me. I forget about people like her and what big characters they are in my book of life. She is a big part of my story, and possibly a plays a part in the way I define my life in Costa Rica. And too busy thinking about my own story, I haven’t taken time to think about her book. Her plotline. Her theme. Her story. Am I in it? If it were made into a movie, would I be in enough scenes to get my name at the top of the credits? What role would I play? I love to think about the pictures tourists have taken that I am walking by or standing slack jawed in the background. I’ll be hanging out in that picture forever. I’m practically stuck in it, had Photoshop never been invented. What if I had smiled and posed? Done a peace sign? I had the power. Maybe it would’ve made the picture better, maybe worse, but I would have changed it. Someone would look at it, the way they look at their story, and define me. God wrote me into the story of people I meet, the same way he wrote them into mine. How can I change their story, or play a leading part? Or be the minor character that culminates the theme? God wrote us all for a reason. I don’t know what my reason is yet, and odds look good I never will. But he wrote me anyways.